This is Not from the Daily Mail and It Is Not About Chris Brown or Karrueche Tran
by Caitlin Brady
Karrueche Flashes SIDEBOOB… and Chris Can’t LOOK Away
The 27 year-old model-actress hit LA hot spot TWYST last night with her gal pals, only for ex, troubled singer-dancer Chris Brown, to rain on her parade.
According to eyewitnesses, while the gal pals gyrated in a VIP cube Chris followed behind and began to shout at the model and face of Korean brand Le Coq Sportif (the sporty cock).
[link to the athletic cock – French??? / use Korean]
Months ago Karrueche indicated the breakup over social media, posting a sad emoji along with a quote from the Bible:
“I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last.
—#Jesus, Revelations 22:13”
[insert: screengrab from @KarruechefanREAL, + sad emoji w/ little mouth, raised eyebrows]
Close friends of the Athletic Cock model speculate a baby started the spat.
[link to story: Can you blame this face?]
As she ran from the club, the visibly distressed “3 Headed Shark Attack” actress was sexy without giving it away, flashing some sideboob in a cropped lace mini dress that also showed off her long bronze pins.
Her signature raven locks were swept back and her glossy pout downcast, but her smoky eyes continued to smoulder through what appeared to be streaming tears. She topped off her look with sexy strappy sandals and a fur-lined clutch.
Get Karrueche’s Look!
[link to sandals + cheaper suggestions]
[link to clutch + cheaper suggestions]
[link to waterproof mascara]
As Karrueche climbed into her awaiting SUV, Chris appeared to push his way in as well, after his earlier attempt for an audience with the Lady Crooks pitch-woman had failed.
[link to Vamp Ladies Knit Bralette – only in L???]
Just three blocks from Karrueche’s home the SUV paused to expel the “Take You Down” crooner, who then chased the vehicle while shouting obscenities.
[link to “Take You Down”]
[link to arrest record]
It was then reported that some time later Karrueche frantically phoned police that the “Wet The Bed” dancer had scaled the hedge and was banging on her door in a rage.
[insert: Photo ca. 2008] – “The Way It Was Before It Wasn’t”
Police arrived at the scene to escort the belligerent groove-machine away from his statuesque former flame.
It appears Karrueche posted on her account that night another Bible quote from her favorite book of Revelations, as the Korean-born beauty seems to be leaning heavily on her Christian faith, this time incorporating two downcast purple devil emojis.
“Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent. –#Christ Revelation 3:19 NV”
[insert: screengrab from @KarruechefanREAL, + sad purple devil emoji + sad purple devil emoji]
As for Chris’s response to the incident, the “Sex You Back To Sleep” hit-maker has made no statement other than posting a snap of himself lounging poolside at his palatial Beverly Hills estate:
[insert: photo from @BreezyRLauthentic;)]
Get Chris’s Look!
[link to polo]
[link to shorts]
[link to cigar]
The former free-lance stylist and “Fright Night Files” actress looked downcast at a juice bar the next morning, though she still managed to enjoy a delicious green beverage to go. Long pins on display, she was again the picture of casual sexy strolling in a shrunken denim boiler suit and towering wedges.
The only comment from the model has been yet another cryptic quote from Revelations, accompanied this time by a rainbow gif.
“I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and makes war. –#Christ #Revelation 19:11 NIV”
[insert: screengrab from @KarruechefanREAL + rainbow gif ]
[link to denim boiler suit]
Caitlin Brady is an MFA candidate from Texas who writes fiction and humor. She studied screenwriting at New York University and collaborated with Animal Kingdom Films (It Follows, Short Term 12), on a feature-length script.